Angry People
"Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul." [Proverbs 22:24, 25]
Solomon's very practical words
of advise when heeded can save us a lot of trouble and heartache. Why is that
so? In Proverbs we read that the angry person is known for the foolishness of
his ways. When a person is controlled by anger his judgment is clouded.
The result is a loss of a sense of purpose and his actions are both out of
proportion to the situation and unpredictable [Proverbs 14:17, 29]. Angry people
cause trouble because they are quick to take offense and slow to being forgiving
[Proverbs 29:22; 15:16; 19;11]. Trying to help an angry person is an exercise in
frustration. They never seem to learn any lessons from their problems and baling
them out of trouble is counter productive because the begin to think they got away with something.
The end result is that things get worse not better [Proverbs 19:19]. An angry
man's actions are defenseless because they exercise no self-control and have no
immunity to their self-destructive passions from within and temptations from
without [Proverbs 25:23; 15;32].
So what are we to do when dealing with
an angry person? What can an angry person do to control his anger? First
the angry person must learn to redirect his anger toward finding a solution
rather than directing his anger toward people. This helps release the energies
of anger under control in a positive way. Secondly, if anger is directed toward a
person or persons rather than toward finding a solution, one must seek
forgiveness by admitting their actions were wrong [Ephesians 4:31, 32]. A brief
comment on seeking forgiveness. Nothing is gain by saying I'm sorry. The proper
response is to admit your actions were wrong! It is in admitting one's actions
were wrong that you begin to take responsibility for your actions. Thirdly, when
anger is wrongly expressed no benefit is gained by trying to justify your action.
This is only an attempt to escape responsibility.
Fourthly, nothing is gained trying to hide your anger. Honest
communication is necessary to find a solution and gain control of your anger.
Fifthly, angry people must stop insisting on their rights and begin to exercise
self-control which is a fruit of the Spirit. The fruit of the Spirit is
developed when sin is confessed to God, followed by an admission that
their anger cannot be controlled and by asking God to control the anger through
the power of the Holy Spirit [Galatians 5:22, 23]. That means learning to be
obedient to Biblical instruction like that found in James 1:19, 20: "Wherefore,
my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to
wrath: For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God." Also consider
Proverbs 15:1; 21:23. Sixthly, the first sign of being able to control your
anger is by learning to avoid petty disagreements [Proverbs 17:14; 19:11].
Seventhly, the most important step in controlling your anger is maintaining a daily
relationship with the Lord through Bible reading, prayer and scripture
memorization.
If you constantly find yourself in the company of an angry person,
what should you do? You should "make no friendship with an angry man; and
with a furious man thou shalt not go: Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare
to thy soul [Proverbs 22:24, 25]." The Apostle Paul put it this way, "Do not be
deceived: 'Evil company corrupts good habits' [I Corinthians 15:33
(NKJV)]." Then never
act in a way that causes others to be offended by your words or deeds therefore
provoking them to anger. "Behold, I send you forth as sheep in the midst of
wolves: be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves [Matthew 10:16]."
Finally commit the angry person to God by praying regularly for him.
"When I hear of anybody losing his temper, I always pray that he
may not find it again. Such tempers are best lost." [Spurgeon]
